Bumper
Live Intro:
Segment One: Defining Terms
- Feminism - The advocacy of women's rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.
- Toxic Masculinity/Femininity - a set of attitudes and ways of behaving stereotypically associated with or expected of men/women, regarded as having a negative impact on men/women and on society as a whole.
- Examples: Men Cant Cry, Men are tough, Men don’t cook, Men are Strong Women are emotional, Women should just be moms, Women are soft
- Misogyny - dislike or strong prejudice against women.
- Misandry - dislikes or strong prejudice against men.
- Ironic sexism - Hipster sexism or liberal sexism, is the notion that if sexism done is tongue-in-cheek it’s okay, even hilarious. Examples: Make me a sandwich. Wanna hear a joke? Women’s rights. Kill all men. Elliot Page.
Segment Two: Consequences:
- Consequences of Toxic Gender Roles
- Men’s Roles
- lack of self-care,
- lack of cancer screenings. In a 2011 Study men with more traditionally masculine ideas are only half as likely to get preventative care
- lack of mental health care
- Men die by suicide 3.53x more often than women. The rate of suicide in America is highest in middle-aged white men. Overall, suicide rates among women declined by 8% between 2019 and 2020. Among men, suicide rates dropped by 2%.
- About 6 of every 10 men experience at least one trauma in their lives: Men are more likely to experience trauma related to accidents, physical assault, combat, disaster, or witnessing death or injury.
- Men are almost two times more likely to binge drink than women. A 2007 study finds more likely to engage in smoking, drug use, and bad dieting.
- Forty-nine percent of men feel more depressed than they admit to the people in their life: A Today Show survey of more than 1,000 men revealed the truth that many already assume. Men are much less likely to voice struggles with mental illness, and even thoughts of suicide.
- Women’s Roles
- the pressure to be quiet, nurturing, and submissive can lead to women falling victim to abuse or remaining in unsafe conditions due to feeling duty-bound to stay. 1 in 3 women have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner. This includes a range of behaviors (e.g. slapping, shoving, pushing)
- Discouraged from positions of power. Going into 2022, women earn 82 cents for every $1 a man earns when comparing all women to all men.
- Ironic Sexism
- When feminists joke that they are misandrists, they are riffing off the misguided popular notion that they are man-haters. They mean to satirize the women who say they are not feminists because they love men. It’s an inside, inside joke. They are satirizing the people defining feminism itself as misandry.
- The irony is all too often lost, despite arguments that the male allies to feminism are in on the joke and love it. The anecdotal evidence of that is not convincing, last year, a 2013 Huffington Post poll found that only 23 percent of women and 16 percent of men consider themselves to be feminists. Of that 16 percent, very few would probably find jokes about misandry funny.
- Parodying tropes of feminism’s enemies is not, in itself, unfunny or unhelpful. Leandra Medine has a very funny site called Man Repeller, which rejects the notion that women’s fashion is all about attracting men. On Twitter, @WomanAgainstFeminism takes on the popular hashtag used by women who disavow the movement with satirical rationales that humorously point out all the ways that women do actually need feminism. Example: “I don’t need feminism because wondering if I’m going to be attacked just walking home really gets my blood racing it is like free drugs!!!!!”
- But inherent in this word “misandry” is hatred. Inherent phrases like “ban men” and “male tears” are cruelty and violence. If a man wore a tee-shirt that said “misogynist,” even if he were a stout feminist, wearing it tongue-in-cheek, would not be funny. It would be misguided.
- To tear it down, feminism needs as many allies as it can get. Telling half the population that you hate them, even in jest, is not the way to do that. Feminism is still very much engaged in the battle for hearts and minds; appealing to the sense of humor of a very small minority of the population can be a good way to alienate the rest.
- Segment Three: Solutions-ish
- The Goodmen project
- Tom Matlack, 2009 interviewed men on defining moments in their lives.
- Book => Film => Events => Movement.
- What he discovered was that the connected idea between all the stories of the men Tom talked to was that there was a moment when each man “woke up, looked in the mirror and said ‘I thought I knew what it meant to be a man. I thought I knew what it meant to be good. And I realize that I don’t know either.'”
- Check them out, doing good work
- What Can People Do?
- Redefine what is masculine and feminine.
- Learn to be vulnerable and talk with the people you love.
- Educate others and lead by example
- Intervene when you see it happening
- Be an Ally and uplift each other.
- What Can Parents Do?
- Be a role model to your children.
- Do not define their role for them.
- Communication
- Teach Consent.
Resources
What Is Toxic Masculinity? By Amy Morin, LCSW
https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-toxic-masculinity-5075107
What Is Toxic Femininity? By Zuva Seven
https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-toxic-femininity-5222736
Mothers are the first defense against toxic masculinity. By Danielle Simone Brand
https://theweek.com/articles/889325/mothers-are-first-defense-against-toxic-masculinity
The National Domestic Violence Hotline - Call 1.800.799.SAFE (7233)
or visit https://www.thehotline.org/
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Hours: Available 24 hours. Learn more 800-273-8255
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=web&utm_campaign=onebox
The Goodmen Project
https://goodmenproject.com/
Boca Recovery Center - For help call (800) 516-4357
This is an excellent resource about Codependency. Codependency is prevalent in toxic relationships, especially those where addiction is present.
https://bocarecoverycenter.com/addiction/am-i-codependent/
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